How many mothers have gotten to a point of complete frustration with their kids? You feel so out of control with the situation that you resort to yelling to find a moments worth of control. But does that actually work? There are so many negative affects to shouting at your children that feeling in charge for any amount of time isn’t even worth it! It’s said that yelling could be just as bad if not worse then physical abuse. What do you think? To better explain what I mean by this, I am going to go over why you should stop yelling at your kids.
Why do parents yell?
Being a mother is a demanding job that requires constant effort, day and night. That means, you have almost no break from your responsibilities and its only natural to become overwhelmed and so frustrated that you feel like the only solution you have is to yell. I mean how many times can you tell your child no before they stop doing it?
Ok, I’m going to come right out and say it… Shouting solves nothing!! Instead, take a second to really think about what is frustrating you and figure out a solution.
For example, you have been telling your toddler not to do something for the last twenty minutes and your at your wits end! So you holler at them to get their attention so they will stop. Instead, take a deep breath and look at the situation; what they are doing and why they are not listening! It could possibly be that they want your undivided attention, because toddlers need lots of mommy time. Or it could be something entirely different. Its YOUR job to figure it out!
Here is why you should stop yelling at your kids
1. Emotional development
Children rely on their parents to help shape them and help them develop in to healthy adults. When we are constantly screaming at our kids we are sending negative signals to their brain and ultimately hindering their emotional development. For example; creating insecurity and loneliness.
It also makes kids feel like they can’t be open about what they are feeling or it will have negative effects. Studies have shown that constant yelling can lead to behavioral problems such as; aggressive behavior, development of fear, poor concentration, poor self esteem, lack of confidence, feeling of loneliness, depression, anxiety and a lack in social skills.
When a child is subjected to verbal abuse such as constant yelling, they will develop an aggressive behavior. Which makes total sense because that is what they are used to seeing.
3. Poor academic performance
Every kid tries to please their parents. Often times when kids are yelled at continuously by their parents, they will stop trying to please them. Why please someone knowing they are just going to yell at you while you do it?
4. Create insecurity
When you constantly yell at your child they develop a sense of fear of expressing themselves, because when they try to they get screamed at. This in turn creates a sense of insecurity in your child and low self worth thus, creating loneliness, because they no longer have the confidence to say what they are feeling. While they may be interacting with other kids, they are not getting the fulfillment of expressing there emotions which is important for a child’s development.
5. Breaks the bond between mother and child
Constant yelling is a form of bullying! When you always yell at your kids, you are ultimately providing an unsafe place for them. A child needs their parent to make them feel safe, when they don’t feel that way around you the bond you had becomes broken. They no longer feel you are a comforting person they can rely on! This is the biggest reason why you should stop yelling at your kids, because if they don’t have you, who do they have?
Yelling is a choice! You might think well, they don’t listen or I don’t have time to tell them fifty more times to stop doing something. By having a child you basically sign a personal contract stating you will do everything in your power to raise these tiny humans into healthy successful adults. It is YOUR job to help your child develop into the wonderful, successful, loving adult they deserve to be.
Want to remember this? Save it to your favorite Pinterest board!
It’s not to late to change how you handle these situations! You can stop yelling as a way to solve a problem!